10 Ways to Grow Spiritually with Your Spouse

This is the start of my newest article from Today’s Christian Woman.

When it comes to strengthening our marriages and growing together, some types of growth are more clear-cut than others. When we wanted to grow in our dancing skills, Michael and I took a dance class. When we wanted to grow in our parenting skills, we read books and talked with veteran parents. When we wanted to grow in our communication skills, we went to marriage counseling together. But how we grow together spiritually is a little less obvious.

Ultimately, as we both aim to know and love Jesus more, our marriage will benefit from the pursuit of Christ, and including one another in our spiritual lives can bring more unity and joy into our home. But other than attending church together, how can we grow spiritually together?

Here are ten ways we’ve been able to grow together spiritually that might enrich your marriage too. Some of these might just surprise you.

10 Ways to Grow Spiritually With Your Spouse at www.annswindell.com

1. Go on a wild adventure together. Take a trip to a new city, or do something out of your comfort zone, like jet skiing or scuba diving. New experiences create new chances for conversation about what you value, along with occasions for reflection on your lives together. Are you both satisfied or hungering for something more? Deviating from the rhythms of regular life helps people articulate what they need more clearly. New adventures open up windows for meaningful connection—practically and spiritually—as you get out of the patterns that you rely on during the week.

10 Ways to Grow Spiritually with Your Spouse Share on X

2. Join a small group that makes you think. If your church has a small group ministry, choose a group that you can attend together. The weekly—or monthly—chance to talk with others about God, read the Bible together, and chat about spiritual matters can open up important questions and conversations that spill into your home. Michael and I have had many, many conversations about God and our spiritual journeys that were piqued by discussion during a small group. A small group provides a consistent time set aside for spiritual growth, and when you go together you will grow together.

3. Have sex! Marital intimacy is a powerful spiritual bonding agent, and consistent, healthy sex connects you to your spouse in a way that nothing else can. Sex is spiritually powerful because it is meant to point you toward deeper intimacy, not only with your spouse but also with God. Intimacy in the bedroom can help foster spiritual intimacy and vice versa.

Read the other seven ways to grow together as a couple spiritually here, at Today’s Christian Woman!

Waiting with Hope Devotional by Ann Swindell www.annswindell.com

The Power of Mini Marriage Retreats

Mini Marriage Retreats--how to make them happen even if you don't have much time or money!

Michael and I had a great rhythm of consistent date nights and quarterly marriage retreats (read: weekends away) prior to having our daughter. Now (ahem), while the date nights still happen every week, the quarterly marriage retreats have kind of fallen off the map. And we’ve realized, afresh, why they are so important to our relationship. Time away together gets us out of the normal rhythms of our lives, which, while helpful, can also lead to ruts of communication and connection. When we are in a new city, eating new food, seeing new sights–that’s when we find out new things about one another and, often, new conversations and dreams bubble up between us.

Getting away together doesn’t need to be fancy, expensive, or exotic. It just needs to happen. Here are the hows and whys for getting away with your spouse–in a meaningful way.

Getting away together doesn't need to be fancy, expensive, or exotic. It just needs to happen. Share on X

1. Aim for easy, not exotic. Now, don’t get me wrong–I would looooove to head to Hawaii for a weekend away. But we live in the Chicago area, and we have neither the time nor the money to go to Hawaii regularly (or, actually, ever). So we explore the surrounding suburbs–the towns 20 minutes away–and walk through their shops and try new restaurants. When we haven’t had the money, we drive back to stay in our own home overnight.

2. Make time for intentional connection. Time away together is wonderful–but it won’t accomplish much if we’re still focused on work or tied to our phones. Make sure that you engage in meaningful conversation–buy a book that opens up new conversations, or start reading a marriage book together (this one is our favorite!). And make sure to spend time meaningfully connecting back at the hotel, too! 🙂

3. Try something new. New experiences spark new connections–and are part of the reason why getting away really matters. So, along with trying a new restaurant, do something fun–and new–together. A chocolate tasting night, a boat tour, go-karting, an opera–with an open mind and some creativity, even small towns offer opportunities for newness together!

If we are willing to invest our time and money in our spouse, our marriages will only be strengthened. It doesn’t have to be expensive or long, but time away to refresh an renew as a couple is important for any marriage. And of course, if you can afford to get away to Hawaii, please–go for it!

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Related post: Three Ways to Make Your Marriage Better