life

Squeezed for Time and Resting in God

March 10, 2015 by Ann 1 Comment

When you’re juggling a lot of roles–wife, employee, mom, student, friend, sister–or any other number of roles–it can feel like there’s no margin in our lives. We feel tired, exhausted, maybe even worn-down. And in that mental state, it can seem harder and harder to believe that there’s some sort of dim light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. I have days where it feels like my season will never change–that I’ll always feel tired, or that I’ll always be pressed for time.

And you know what I’m having to come to terms with? That might actually be the case. From now until I die, I might always feel hard-pressed, squeezed, even, for time. In his book, The Sacred Journey, Frederick Buechner writes about how children are the ones who live “below time;” they do not experience time in the same way as adults do because they do not yet have a sense of its earthly finiteness, nor do they carry the responsibilities that we do once we grow up. At some point, though, all of us open the door unto time and find ourselves living within the reality of limited days. Most of us are always a bit wistful for the days of carefree timelessness. But we cannot go back.

And so, yes I have lost that sense of timelessness, of freedom away from the clock. I have roles and responsibilities that will forever keep me from being free of the constraints of time. But I would not trade those good things for unhindered freedom. Every thing that truly matters requires tethering, especially love.

Every thing that truly matters requires tethering, especially love. Share on X

And so I am tethered to these roles and responsibilities, and sometimes I feel like I might break under the weight of them. But then I find that I am able to bend a bit more, and I find that I’m living in the grace of Christ, who does not break those who are already bending. He upholds us. He strengthens us. He fights on our behalf.

So, then, how can I live peacefully when time always feels thin? Well, in the midst of unending demands and requirements on our time, it is important–even necessary–to give ourselves time to rest. I’ve already written about why I believe the Sabbath is so central to our rhythms of weekly life, but on the smaller scale of day-to-day life, how can we rest? How can we allow ourselves to take short breaks in the midst of our days so that we don’t break under the weight of our responsibilities?

There are many ways to do this, but here are five of my favorite, simple ways to rest daily:

1. Connecting with Christ. This is so important for me–I’ve written more about it here, but the fact is that unless I’m staying close to Jesus, everything else feels overwhelming and stressful. Half an hour with him in the morning shifts my mindset toward His priorities and gives me the grace I need to do all that I’m called to do. This can look different for all of us, but my time with God in the morning includes reading the Word, praying, and journaling.

2. Choosing Gratitude. It’s amazing how quickly thankfulness can change my attitude and my perspective. If I can make the choice to say–out loud–three things that I’m thankful for, I’m usually humbled to bits–in the best sense. I have been given so much, and God is with me through it all.

3. A long(ish) shower. I’m not joking. When you can close (and lock!) the door, a shower offers a little time to let my brain rest, let my body rest, and let my senses rest. If you have time for a long soak, even better!

4. Five minutes in silence. Put down the phone, the remote, the headphones. Sit, quietly, and try to let all of the tension seep out of your body. Ask God for a fresh dose of His peace in your heart, mind, and bones.

5. A hot drink in the wintertime, a cold drink in the summertime. The sensory power of being refreshed or warmed is something that often brings me a few moments of pleasure, gratefulness, and peace–if I attend to my senses and allow myself to slow down.

Even in the busy days that most of us find ourselves in, there is grace from Christ to live peacefully. Small steps like these can help us slow down and be present in the life that we are living–they can even help us meet God in the midst of the busyness.

Filed Under: God, Life, Marriage, Motherhood Tagged With: burn out, burnout, busy, Christianity, daily ways to rest, daily ways to rest so we don't burn out, faith, God rested, hope, How do I rest, how to not burn out, Jesus, life, refreshment, too busy, ways to rest

God-Help Instead of Self-Help

January 7, 2015 by Ann Leave a Comment

My newest article is up at Today’s Christian Woman, where I have the privilege of being a regular contributor.

Here’s the start of the article:

There’s no denying we are a nation of people looking for help. Although we may try to seem put together on the outside, our book purchases alone point to a different reality: we are struggling, and we’re looking for help anywhere we can find it. “Self-help” is an entire industry in this nation that generates roughly $10 billion per year—and the industry shows no signs of slowing down. Whether you want to read about fixing broken relationships, living more healthily, making more money, or finding contentment, there’s a self-help book—or 50—out there for you. And if you are willing to spend the time and the money, there are myriad options for self-help conferences, webcasts, and personal coaching, along with the thousands of books you can read.

It’s common for self-help books to tout that they offer the key to “win in life and business” and “unlock the way to life’s riches.” And why not? Who doesn’t want to have a better life, make more money, and experience more happiness? Who doesn’t want life to be easier, simpler, faster?

Chasing an Illusion
But perhaps what we want is something we were never promised—and so we’re chasing an illusion.

We live complex, challenging lives, and many of the promises offered by self-help gurus seem wonderful and easy. Too easy. We want a quick way out of our difficult marriage without having to work through the pain. We want to make money easily and without having to work diligently. We want to feel happy without having to face our own brokenness.

Jesus is clear—unapologetically so—in telling his followers that “in this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33, NIV). This life is not meant to be perfect. In fact, Scripture tells us this earth isn’t our real home—we are “foreigners” on this earth (Hebrews 11:13) and our real home is in heaven (Philippians 3:20). If we’re longing for perfection and pure happiness on this earth, we will always be disappointed.

The “Self Problem” with Self-Help

There’s a second problem with the self-help industry: the self-help industry depends—unsurprisingly—on self. In the solar system of self-help, the sun in the center of it all is you—and, apparently, you can make everything better on your own if you can just read the right books and access the right resources. Ultimately, the focus of self-help books comes down to a reliance on self as the one who can make things right.

This reliance on self, though, is in directly opposition to Christianity. As believers in Christ, we have already declared—through our very faith in Jesus as our Savior—that we are not reliant upon ourselves. We are reliant upon Jesus. In fact, when we believed in Christ as our Lord and Savior, we acknowledged that we cannot save ourselves at all. We cannot get “better,” in any way, on our own. We need a Savior to rescue us from our sin and from ourselves, and the danger of the self-help industry is that it lures us to look for help outside of Jesus.

This doesn’t mean self-help books and media are all bad. Some offer helpful insights on how to relate to others and set healthy boundaries on our time and with our money. But if we find ourselves looking to self-help materials rather than turning to Jesus, we are looking for ultimate help where it can’t be found.

Continue to read the rest of article here!

Filed Under: God, Guest Post, Life, Writing Tagged With: Christianity, faith, God help, health, Jesus, life, love, new year, Self help, Today's Christian Woman, Writer

The Timeliness of Fall

August 28, 2014 by Ann Leave a Comment

I love summer. A Midwesterner my entire life, summer has always been an elusive prize, a questionable gamble between the winters that are always just around the corner. But the freedom to wear sandals and shorts and the opportunity to leave the house without mittens and three layers of clothing is an elusiveness I have always been willing to chase. When the first signs of summer come in April, I am hesitant to embrace the summer fully, knowing the weather will argue with itself for several more weeks. But when May finally comes, I paint my toenails and wear my flip-flops, knowing that there are months ahead of sunshine.

By August, I have all but forgotten about the precariousness of summer in the Midwest. It has been warm for three months, and I cannot remember the feel of close-toed shoes. Skirts and sunglasses are my staple; winter coats have been shoved to the back of the closet. And mittens? What are mittens?

But the past several days in my town have brought with them the first signs of fall—rainy afternoons, and even a few leaves that are turning red and yellow. I am starting to remember that winter does exist, and fall is the reminder.

Something happens in my soul every year when summer begins to fade. I start to remember my first days of school, jumping in piles of leaves with my sister, high school homecoming dances, and college football games. I begin to think backwards in time; I take time to remember.

And as I do this, I think of all of the falls and winters and summers and springs that have already taken place. I begin to think of the fading nature of life, and something in me is always surprised at the way that the seasons pass so quickly. I wonder where the summer went—how August is already over and September itself is disappearing. I think about how quickly winter will arrive and I am humbled by the thought of another Thanksgiving, another Christmas, another New Year and another calendar.

I am surprised to find that I am older, and that time affects me, too. I am reminded that my time on this earth is not endless, and that like the leaves on the trees around me, I too, will die. And this is why fall is timely in her arrival. She is a good teacher. Summer feels timeless; fall reminds me of the true nature of time. Her lessons are subtle but true, and I am trying, this year, to heed the education she offers.

The education is this: to know that death is near and not ignore it, but to live brilliantly in the days that are left. Although winter is imminent and sure, although the leaves on the trees will die, the beauty they offer in their fading is one of the most brilliant scenes in nature.

We can know that death is near and not ignore it, but live brilliantly in the days that are left. Share on X

And this is the truth each one of us faces every day; life on this earth is not endless. We will all have a winter to face, and some of us will meet that season sooner than others, sooner than we planned. But we have the opportunity to live our days with brilliance and beauty—and hope. Christ says that he came to give full life—abundant life—to those who walk in relationship with him (John 10:10). Walking in relationship with Jesus gives us the hope of eternal life and the reality of peace and assurance during our life on this earth. In a world that is confused and hurting, our lives with Jesus show the beauty and brilliance of life that is lived with joy, even when there is the constant possibility of death.

I do not know when I will die; none of us do. But fall beckons me to remember that while we will all face physical death, our lives can proclaim the life and truth of Christ—the one who gives us fullness of life on this earth and the next. That is something truly meaningful, and truly brilliant.