Locking and Unlocking: Wedding Vows

This summer, we were at a family wedding, and it was all the things weddings are meant to be–joyful and poignant, beautiful and somber. The bride and groom are older than Michael and I were when we wed, but I still found myself amazed at how young they are, and how amazing it is that we promised ourselves these things when we just rounded the corner into our twenties.

The Gift that only marriagecan unlock

There is a weightiness at a wedding that is halting, startling. The vows being made are so simple, and yet–and yet–they mean everything. To wed your life to another–to bind in the sense of “tying the knot”–it is a trembling, fearful thing. Not fear-full, but knee-knocking in its own right, because you are locking your life to another and tossing away the key.

To vow your life to another is to toss away the key to making decisions with only yourself in mind. It is to toss away the key to making yourself the highest priority. It is to toss away the key to having relationships that threaten the sacredness of the marriage. It is to toss away the key to a lot of freedoms that exist before that knot is tied.

But marriage also opens doors–more doors than I knew could open through just one other person. Marriage unlocks the mystery of another soul, offering glimpses of the brokenness and the glory of your spouse. It is a holy thing to see my husband at his worst and choose to love him, even as he does the same for me. It is a holy, holy thing to see my husband at his best and marvel that I am the one given the gift of being his partner.

Marriage unlocks a security and a safety that offers haven in a tumultuous world. Marriage unlocks silliness and goofiness and a deep sense of joy. And marriage, at its most beautiful and powerful, unlocks a picture of the love Christ has for his Church–no greater love, no greater tenderness.

This is what we glimpsed at the wedding this weekend. As observers of those vows, we had a peek–through a keyhole–of the doors they were locking and unlocking together. The fullness of the marriage is theirs alone, but it pointed us again to that most wonderful Love–and to the great wedding feast that is coming.

Small Home Hospitality: A Guest Post at (in)courage!

Today, I’m writing for (in)courage about being hospitable in a small home–our small home!

Ann Swindell-DailyGraceHospitality

Here is the start of the article. I would love for you to join me at (in)courage!

We have a small home — a split-level condo with two bedrooms and a galley kitchen that never seems to have enough counter space. I know that in most places in the world, our home size would be considered normal, or perhaps even large. But here in affluent suburbia where we live, our square footage is, comparatively, on the compact end of things.

Any time we have more than a handful of people over — such as this last weekend for my daughter’s first birthday party — we run out of seating quickly. Often, guests start spilling onto the stairs, sitting on steps when the couches and chairs are full.

My tendency, in the past, was to worry about the lack of space, to try and fix things by giving up my seat or finding another stool. Because when I saw people sitting on the stairs, my hospitality button got pushed: I didn’t feel like I could provide what my guests needed. I never want anyone to feel uncomfortable in my home — physically or socially — and I was concerned that our small home would make people feel cramped and unwelcome.

Read the rest of the article here!

 

Life is Too Short: Reflections on the Influence Conference

influence.friends.1

Up until the end of August, I hadn’t even planned on going to the Influence Conference. But as I saw women talking about the conference online, something kept tugging at my heart. I felt like I was supposed to be there.

Now, I knew it was a big leap. We have a young daughter, my husband was going to be out of town the weekend before, and we tend to have a lot of church events on the weekends.

But Michael and I prayed about it, and we both felt like I should go.

So, I did. Bought the ticket, booked the hotel room, filled the car with gas and drove. I had to be back by Saturday night, so the time was fast but so rich. I connected with so many wonderful women, talked about things that truly matter, and slept in a hotel room all by myself (glory, glory, hallelujah)! The weekend was a gift from God, truly.

I’m grateful.

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God opened up many places in my heart last weekend, but one of the biggest things I’m wrestling through is what Lara Casey spoke about on Friday night. She walked us through a workshop focused on some very powerful questions, and although it is incredibly simple, the one phrase that I keep coming back to is this one, which she asked us to answer on our own: “Life is too short.”

Life is too short to make it all about me.

Life is too short to not obey Jesus wholeheartedly.

Life is too short to live out of fear.

These are huge statements, when the rubber actually meets the road. If life is too short to make it all about me, what has to change in how I think, how I respond, what I spend my time doing? If life is too short to not obey Jesus wholeheartedly, how do I have to start living and thinking differently? If life is too short to live out of fear, where do I need to let His perfect love chase away those places tangled up in being afraid?

I’m just starting to scratch the surface of these things, but these questions have the power to change my life, in the best way. Life is too short for anything less than all of my heart, all of my attention, all of my focus on Christ.

So, now it is your turn. How would you answer this phrase?

Life is too short.

And because I know there a lot of women who wanted to go to the conference but couldn’t, I want to share my #influenceconf swag bag with one of you! Check out my Instagram account to toss your hat in the ring–and hopefully, win!

He is Our Brave

I do not think of myself as a naturally brave person. I’ve never been bungee jumping or sky diving—and I have zero desire to do so. I like knowing what’s coming at me, and I prefer having a life that’s fairly scheduled. I’m not a big fan of change. I’ve never done anything particularly heroic or courageous that anyone else would have noticed.

Brave mama

 

But in this past week, I have been drawn to this song, entitled “You Make Me Brave.” Here are some of the lyrics:

As Your love,
in wave after wave

Crashes over me,
crashes over me

For You are for us

You are not against us

Champion of Heaven

You made a way for all to enter in

I have heard You call my name

I have heard the song of love that You sing

So I will let You draw me out beyond the shore

Into Your grace

Into Your grace

You make me brave

You make me brave

You call me out beyond the shore into the waves

You make me brave

You make me brave

No fear can hinder now the love that made a way

Those words remind me of the words of the One who called Joshua to be “strong and courageous” (Joshua 1:9), the words of the One who says that His “perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18) and the One whose words tell me that I am like the matriarch Sarah, if I “do good and do not fear anything that is frightening” (1 Peter 3:6). So much of Scripture is filled with the call to let go of fear and to grasp onto the love of God—the only unfailing love that fills us with courage even as He calls us into new and challenging things.

And as I’ve been thinking about bravery, I feel like God has gently shown me that I have been brave during this last year. Not in ways that anyone else would notice—I have not run into any burning houses or jumped from any helicopters. But I have realized that these last fifteen months of my life—becoming a mama—have required me to be braver than I ever thought I could be. I’ve written before, but the transition into motherhood wasn’t easy for me. I had no idea how it would change everything in my life all at once–and remember, change isn’t easy for me. But, the love of God upheld me. And mothering Ella is simultaneously the most wonderful and the most crazy thing I’ve ever done.

Every day I realize, afresh, that no one else can be her mother. And that requires great bravery from me—to keep saying yes.

Every day, even when I feel like I have very little in my own tank, I say yes to Jesus. And He—He is the one who makes me brave. He is the one who enables me to say yes again to the responsibility and yes to the joy and yes to the exhaustion and yes to the love and yes to the consistency and yes to the laughter and yes to the constant reality is life as a mom. It is costing much of me to be a present, loving mother. I wouldn’t have it any other way. But some days, it is a brave choice for me to show up and love and serve and giggle and clothe and bathe and feed again, one day at a time.

So, to my fellow mamas: you might not be saving the world today, but you are brave. You are raising and loving and serving a little life—or several little lives—and Jesus knows the bravery that requires. He knows the cost. What may not look like much to the outside world—making meals, wiping bottoms, changing clothes, cleaning up Cheerios—looks like bravery from Heaven’s perspective. You are brave for showing up again today, for not pulling your heart out of this beautiful and costly work of mothering. You can be strong and courageous, and you can let His love cast out your fear—because Christ is with you and in you.

He is our brave.

It’s OK to Want to Be Famous: An Article at RELEVANT Magazine

It's OK to Want to Be Famous at Relevant Magazine by Ann Swindell

Do you ever feel the desire to be famous? I do. Honestly, I think it’s a desire that is inside all of us at some point or another–and I think it’s a desire that comes from God.

How we use that ache for fame, though–that’s a different story.

Wrestling with this idea is what my newest piece is about over at RELEVANT Magazine. I’d love for you to read it and share your thoughts!

The desire to be famous could point you to God...

The Timeliness of Fall

I love summer. A Midwesterner my entire life, summer has always been an elusive prize, a questionable gamble between the winters that are always just around the corner. But the freedom to wear sandals and shorts and the opportunity to leave the house without mittens and three layers of clothing is an elusiveness I have always been willing to chase. When the first signs of summer come in April, I am hesitant to embrace the summer fully, knowing the weather will argue with itself for several more weeks. But when May finally comes, I paint my toenails and wear my flip-flops, knowing that there are months ahead of sunshine.

Ann and Michael.FallBy August, I have all but forgotten about the precariousness of summer in the Midwest. It has been warm for three months, and I cannot remember the feel of close-toed shoes. Skirts and sunglasses are my staple; winter coats have been shoved to the back of the closet. And mittens? What are mittens?

But the past several days in my town have brought with them the first signs of fall—rainy afternoons, and even a few leaves that are turning red and yellow. I am starting to remember that winter does exist, and fall is the reminder.

Something happens in my soul every year when summer begins to fade. I start to remember my first days of school, jumping in piles of leaves with my sister, high school homecoming dances, and college football games. I begin to think backwards in time; I take time to remember.

And as I do this, I think of all of the falls and winters and summers and springs that have already taken place. I begin to think of the fading nature of life, and something in me is always surprised at the way that the seasons pass so quickly. I wonder where the summer went—how August is already over and September itself is disappearing. I think about how quickly winter will arrive and I am humbled by the thought of another Thanksgiving, another Christmas, another New Year and another calendar.

I am surprised to find that I am older, and that time affects me, too. I am reminded that my time on this earth is not endless, and that like the leaves on the trees around me, I too, will die. And this is why fall is timely in her arrival. She is a good teacher. Summer feels timeless; fall reminds me of the true nature of time. Her lessons are subtle but true, and I am trying, this year, to heed the education she offers.

The education is this: to know that death is near and not ignore it, but to live brilliantly in the days that are left. Although winter is imminent and sure, although the leaves on the trees will die, the beauty they offer in their fading is one of the most brilliant scenes in nature.

We can know that death is near and not ignore it, but live brilliantly in the days that are left. Share on X

And this is the truth each one of us faces every day; life on this earth is not endless. We will all have a winter to face, and some of us will meet that season sooner than others, sooner than we planned. But we have the opportunity to live our days with brilliance and beauty—and hope. Christ says that he came to give full life—abundant life—to those who walk in relationship with him (John 10:10). Walking in relationship with Jesus gives us the hope of eternal life and the reality of peace and assurance during our life on this earth. In a world that is confused and hurting, our lives with Jesus show the beauty and brilliance of life that is lived with joy, even when there is the constant possibility of death.

I do not know when I will die; none of us do. But fall beckons me to remember that while we will all face physical death, our lives can proclaim the life and truth of Christ—the one who gives us fullness of life on this earth and the next. That is something truly meaningful, and truly brilliant.

How FallPoints us to God (3)