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He is Our Brave

September 10, 2014 by Ann 6 Comments

I do not think of myself as a naturally brave person. I’ve never been bungee jumping or sky diving—and I have zero desire to do so. I like knowing what’s coming at me, and I prefer having a life that’s fairly scheduled. I’m not a big fan of change. I’ve never done anything particularly heroic or courageous that anyone else would have noticed.

But in this past week, I have been drawn to this song, entitled “You Make Me Brave.” Here are some of the lyrics:

As Your love,
in wave after wave 
Crashes over me,
crashes over me 
For You are for us 
You are not against us 
Champion of Heaven 
You made a way for all to enter in

I have heard You call my name
 I have heard the song of love that You sing 
So I will let You draw me out beyond the shore 
Into Your grace 
Into Your grace

You make me brave 
You make me brave 
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves 
You make me brave 
You make me brave 
No fear can hinder now the love that made a way

Those words remind me of the words of the One who called Joshua to be “strong and courageous” (Joshua 1:9), the words of the One who says that His “perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18) and the One whose words tell me that I am like the matriarch Sarah, if I “do good and do not fear anything that is frightening” (1 Peter 3:6). So much of Scripture is filled with the call to let go of fear and to grasp onto the love of God—the only unfailing love that fills us with courage even as He calls us into new and challenging things.

And as I’ve been thinking about bravery, I feel like God has gently shown me that I have been brave during this last year. Not in ways that anyone else would notice—I have not run into any burning houses or jumped from any helicopters. But I have realized that these last fifteen months of my life—becoming a mama—have required me to be braver than I ever thought I could be. I’ve written before, but the transition into motherhood wasn’t easy for me. I had no idea how it would change everything in my life all at once–and remember, change isn’t easy for me. But, the love of God upheld me. And mothering Ella is simultaneously the most wonderful and the most crazy thing I’ve ever done.

Every day I realize, afresh, that no one else can be her mother. And that requires great bravery from me—to keep saying yes.

Every day, even when I feel like I have very little in my own tank, I say yes to Jesus. And He—He is the one who makes me brave. He is the one who enables me to say yes again to the responsibility and yes to the joy and yes to the exhaustion and yes to the love and yes to the consistency and yes to the laughter and yes to the constant reality is life as a mom. It is costing much of me to be a present, loving mother. I wouldn’t have it any other way. But some days, it is a brave choice for me to show up and love and serve and giggle and clothe and bathe and feed again, one day at a time.

So, to my fellow mamas: you might not be saving the world today, but you are brave. You are raising and loving and serving a little life—or several little lives—and Jesus knows the bravery that requires. He knows the cost. What may not look like much to the outside world—making meals, wiping bottoms, changing clothes, cleaning up Cheerios—looks like bravery from Heaven’s perspective. You are brave for showing up again today, for not pulling your heart out of this beautiful and costly work of mothering. You can be strong and courageous, and you can let His love cast out your fear—because Christ is with you and in you.

He is our brave.

Filed Under: About, Baby, God, Life, Parenting, Uncategorized Tagged With: baby, be you bravely, bethel music, brave, Christianity, faith, Jesus, keep your heart alive, mom, motherhood, newborn, saying yes, you make me brave

Forty Years of Saying Yes

July 9, 2014 by Ann 1 Comment

This past week, my parents celebrated forty years of marriage. Forty years! What an amazing milestone. What an incredible thing to celebrate. We live in a culture that glorifies weddings but often slams marriages. And yet what I have seen through the marriage of my parents is something that both rises above culture and challenges it.

My mom grew up as a pastor’s kid; when my parents were married my grandpa did the officiating, and my dad wore a white tuxedo with a powder blue ruffled button down shirt that spilled out from the lapels. After the wedding my father serenaded my mother on the church steps with “The Sweetheart of Sigma Chi” (the man can sing), and they held a reception at the church with punch and cake.

Their wedding was simple. God was honored, promises were made, cake was cut. In the grand scheme of wedding history and the Pinterest-crazy weddings that now take place, their wedding would have seemed, I can imagine, very unimpressive.

But it is their marriage that has proven impressive. It is their marriage that has proven those simple vows true a hundred thousand times over. And I have been one of the closest witnesses to that marriage.

I lived in a home where my parents spoke love to one another and to us every day. “I love you” rang throughout our house like a bell, the echo of the words always hanging until the bell was rung again.

I lived in a home where my parents did fun things together, where they enjoyed one another. I watched them host dinner parties and also get dressed up for nights out. I loved that they went on dates together.

I lived in a home where my parents talked to one another—and to us—openly and honestly. We had dinner together as a family most nights of the week and we shared our days with one another regularly.

I lived in a home where my parents kissed each other often and unashamedly. There was very little that made me happier as a child than to see how genuinely my parents were in love.

I lived in home where my parents told us that they would never divorce and that they would always be together. I am eternally grateful that they meant it.

I lived in a home where my parents laughed. And laughed. And laughed. I lived in a home where we all laughed together so hard sometimes that we had to pull away from the dinner table to catch our breath.

Is our family perfect? Hardly. Is their marriage perfect? By no means. But for forty years my parents have lived out their promises and their love with faithfulness and with tenderness and with joy—so much joy. They have walked through deep trials, as every marriage does. They have walked through countless changes, as any marriage stretched over forty years is bound to walk through. But they have clung to Christ and to each other, and their marriage is a beautiful representation of the love of Christ and his church.

I am honored to know them as parents and also as friends. And I celebrate you, Mom and Dad. Your faithfulness in marriage has borne great fruit. Thank you for saying yes at the altar forty years ago. And thank you for continuing to say yes to God and to each other every day of those last forty years. I love you both more than I can say.

Filed Under: About, Marriage, Uncategorized Tagged With: 40th anniversary, anniversary, Christ-centered marriage, Christian marriage, Christian vows, family, Jesus, love, marriage, parents, tribute, wedding

Two Kinds of Freedom

July 4, 2014 by Ann Leave a Comment

I’m celebrating two kinds of freedom today. And I’m thankful for both.

But most of all, I’m thankful for this: “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.” (Galatians 5:1a)

Happy Freedom Day, friends. May we live fully into freedom today.

Filed Under: About, God Tagged With: 4th of July, family, for freedom Christ has set us free, freedom, freedom in Christ, Galatians, Jesus, laughter

So You Say You’re a Church Lady: My Response

June 30, 2014 by Ann 3 Comments

I’m adding my own voice to the Church Lady series today—not because I think I’m a “powerhouse woman” by any means, but because I love the church and wanted to share my heart for the church with you, my readers! The other women who I have interviewed so far have inspired and challenged me, and I am grateful for each one of them. I hope my thoughts can add even just a little more fuel to the fire of our passion for Jesus and His church!

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1. Tell us a little bit about the church that you’re a part of.

My husband is the College Pastor at Antioch Community Church in Wheaton, a non-denominational church in the Chicago suburbs. Our local church is part of a larger church-planting organization (Antioch International Movement of Churches) that has multiple churches in the US and overseas!

2. What does it look like, in your life, to be an active part of your church?

Even before Michael stepped in to full-time ministry, we were always actively involved in church. Now that he’s a pastor, it is just a little more “official.” I help him lead the college ministry by discipling female leaders, hosting and helping lead small groups, and generally just being available for whatever our church needs, whether that is showing up for a meeting, helping with a retreat, or bringing food to an event!

3. How are your unique gifts and abilities strengthened by being part of a local church?

The church is amazing because it’s the place where a bunch of amateurs get to do meaningful, life-changing work. I say that with deep joy and love—I’m thankful that God uses amateurs! My gifts of developing and discipling other women flourish in the church even though I don’t have any formal training in that area. But God has taught me through his word and through his presence and through his people how to love and lead others in the church.

I went to school for many years in order to get the academic degrees that I have—degrees that give me the credentials I need to teach at the college level and have access to impacting the lives of my students every week. But I don’t have to hold a degree to impact others at church. My life and the fruit of my life are the things that matter within the walls of the church—and I can impact others without having any fancy letters behind my name. We all can. That’s a huge relief—and a high calling.

4. How has being part of a church challenged and changed you?

I am an achiever, and I like being able to move from one task to another with purpose and clarity. Church doesn’t work that way, because people don’t work that way. People—who the church is made up of—need love, cultivation, guidance, accountability…the list goes on. I need all of those things; you need all of those things. But we don’t move from one plane of growth to another seamlessly. “Through many trials, thorns, and snares I have already come…” Church is the place where we help one another through those trials and where we help one another continue to say yes to Jesus. It’s difficult at times. Very difficult. People don’t always respond well to pain or to challenge—I sure don’t 100 percent of the time! But as I continue to learn to love God’s people, I continue to learn more about the boundless love of Christ. And that is what has both challenged and changed me. God’s love is changing his people, and it’s changing me as I learn to love them.

5. Why do you value church? What do you love about church?

I value Church because Jesus values Church—if His bride was worth his life then it can certainly be worth mine. My time, my energy, my heart, my tears, my life—it all belongs to Christ. If he spent all he had for the people of God, I want to give my life doing the same.

Filed Under: About, So You Say You're a Church Lady Series Tagged With: church, church lady, family, Jesus, ministry, pastor, pastor's wife, pastoring, women in ministry

Dear Dada: A Letter from Ella

June 13, 2014 by Ann Leave a Comment

Dear Dada,

You are the best! Whenever I hear your voice–or even your name–I get so excited that I just have to say Dadadadadadadadada over and over. That’s because you are my favorite DaDa. When you come in the door from work I love showing you my biggest smile because I am so happy that you are home!

This last year has been really exciting for me! I learned how to roll over, how to crawl, how to eat (and spit out) food, how to say some words, and I even learned how to walk! You have always been so encouraging. You even think that little things are important, like when I started dancing and when I learned how to clap. It makes me feel so special that you pay so much attention to me. I think it’s soooo fun when you roll on the floor with me. You are great for climbing on and snuggling with.

Snuggling–that reminds me! I love when you hold me and sing to me. I feel so safe in your arms. You are so big and strong and your voice makes me feel like everything is going to be ok, even when I am really tired or scared. Even when it’s in the middle of the night. Even when you’re tired, too. Thanks for always scooping me up and telling me that you love me.

By the way, I’ve noticed that you tell me that you love me all the time, and I hear you tell Mama the same thing. It makes her smile. You give us both lots of kisses and snuggles. We sure are glad to be your girls.

Mama tells me almost every day that I look just like you and that you and I are two peas in a pod. I don’t know what that means, but I like eating peas so I think it’s a good thing…

And Dada? Thank you for praying for me. Mama tells me that you pray for me every day. She tells me that we are so blessed to have you as the leader of our home and that I have the best Dada in the world. I believe her. You are my favorite Dada and I love you with all my heart. Happy Dada’s Day!

Love,
Ella Bean

Filed Under: About, Baby, Marriage, Uncategorized

Becoming a “Redbud”

May 23, 2014 by Ann Leave a Comment

Last month, I had the privilege of being welcomed into the Redbud Writers Guild. If you have not yet heard of Redbud, it is a movement of women who are shaping culture through their words, whether spoken or written.

As members of Redbud, we aim to “create culture” rather than solely consume it. I love this vision–it helps me remember that I am made to change the culture I live in rather than merely be a part of it. Each of us are made in the image of a creative God who has set his spark in us. How that reflection of his character gets played out in our particular lives is distinct and unique, as it should be. We can sing, dance, design, build, study, cook, rear, cultivate, and do a thousand million other things to reflect the ways that God has made us and has called us to magnify him. But for me, part of my response to God’s salvation and love in my life is to use my words to point to him. The other women who are a part of Redbud have that same response bubbling up from their hearts–that desire to be one of the voices in our generation who speaks and writes about Jesus.

I am honored to join this group of women who are pointing to Christ with their pens, their keyboards, their voices and their hearts. If you want to meet more of them, you can head over to the Redbud Writers Guild website. But be warned–it’s easy to get lost among so many wonderful writers!

P.S. Next Monday, I’m starting a summer-long blog series entitled “So You Say You’re a Church Lady: An Interview Series with Powerhouse Women.” I will be interviewing a woman every Monday about her role in the local church and how she is changing the world in her particular sphere of influence. Make sure to stop by on Monday for the first interview!

Filed Under: About, Uncategorized, Writing